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Palmacosta: The Port City

You land, say goodbye to Max, and a skit adds Battle Tips to your Training Manual. Well, head left into the next area (yeah, that chef guy calls himself the Wonder Chef, but it's not him, sorry dorry). There's also a customization shop, but when exchanging grade (if you do), beware their Grab Bag option, cause you might just waste your grade on crap materials... Oh, and yes, the Masamune is better than the Rapier for Lloyd. And see, now you can customize that useless Flying Disc I had you buy earlier. Never question my motives, ahahaha! ... ^<__<^ *ahem* Anyway. Yeah, buy stuff. Make sure that, by the time you're done, you have less than 1,000g (you'll see why momentarily).

When yer done, go south from the customization guy, then go forwards to trigger a scene. Oops. Man, what an asshole. *sets him on fire* "Oh come on, now you just sound like an idiot." Hahaha, go Lloyd! Well, now you need a replacement potion. And no, sorry, the kid who's staring at the barrel with Palma Potions in it that he dropped into the river won't give you any, and you can't get the barrel, either. Sucks, huh? Well, whatever. Go right into the next area to witness a scene. OK, so that's Dorr? Hrmm... anyway. Go back to the last area. Enter the first building you come across (the lady in the other one just tells you that she's out of Palma Potions) to witness another scene. ... ack, Desians! ... who apparently don't recognize you at all. Ha. Well, talk to Cacao, Chocolat's mother, to open up the shop's inventory. Yep, Palma Potion. 1,000g. Now, before you yell at me, just hear me out, K? Leave the menu, and your party members start talking. Eventually, Cacao suggests visiting the Palmacosta Academy cafeteria so you can earn money (*Note: If you didn't listen to me, and have enough for the potion, then you won't be able to get a Potion for free. This is why you should always listen to the webmaster :op ). Anyway, before going to the cafeteria, you can go upstairs and check out the bookshelf for more information on the Desians.

OK, back in the area where you witnessed the scene with Dorr, go to the far right. The building in the corner is the Palmacosta Academy. Upon entering, you ask Genis if that's where he was supposed to go. Oh, look, stuck up snotty brats making fun of Genis... I'm surprised he doesn't cast Fire Ball on them... ^>__>^;; Choose to accept the challenge, and the kids leave. *grr,* friggin brats. Well, anyway. Go up to the second floor and enter the first classroom. ... hahaha, Kratos is a student, too. That's so amusing. Well, Professor Raine gets to work teaching Genis. Here are the answers:

Palmacosta Academy Challenge
What did Lloyd learn from Kratos in the Triet Ruins? Guardian
On the Ossa Trail, what did the value of 9.8 that Genis substituted refer to? Acceleration due to gravity
Where was Lloyd born? I don't know

Well, enter the classroom next door. If you answered all the questions above right, then Genis wins. Whee! ... haha, you got last place, feel proud. :op Hahaha, OK, no, that's really funny. :oD Heh, Raine got 100% right. *dances along with the music for Genis' victory* Yeah yeah, woo, OK, I need to stop drinking so much caffeine... ^>__>^;; Aww, he decides to stay with you guys. What a guy. New title for Genis, oh yeaaaaah. :oD

Back on the first floor, enter the room at the end of the hallway. This is the cafeteria Cacao was talking about. Talk to the dude in the back, and answer Yes. Now, make sure you have something ready to write this stuff down with, cause, like the EB game, this stuff changes every time. Be sure to write down who the food is for, too, cause you can't be delivering the wrong food to people! ... augh! Man, this thing is hard. But anyway, whether yer great or you suck, the guy gives you a Palma Potion at the end (unless you didn't take my suggestion about having less than 1,000 g earlier). Yay! You can come back and play the game for g afterwards, but right now, to deliver that potion!

... orrrr you can go next door and visit the Church of Martel. Chocolat is there, working as a Pilgrimage guide. Talk to her to find out that the Desians have a death quota... ^O__o^;; Anyway. Talk to the guy in the very back, and he recognizes Colette. Yay? He also talks about the Book of Regeneration. So... Dorr has it? Well, that's something else we have to do, then. First, return to where you broke the other people's Palma Potion. ... Dorr did who the what now with the family treasure? OK, back to the town... er... circle! Go towards the only building we haven't visited yet (it's on the left) and talk to the guard on the right. Kratos now offers to train you. Say yes! Ahahahaaa... anyway.

Enter the building and go up the steps. Dorr greets you... er... family treasure? Why does that sound fami... err.... errr?! ERRRR?!!? ... man. First they don't believe you, then they try to kill you, then they apologize, and then they tell you that they gave the Book to an impostor. Well, obviously the imposters were those idiots whose Palma Potion you broke earlier... great. Aha, Genis gets smacked. So... our next stop is, of course, Hakonesia Peak. Wonderful. Back outside, you get a skit. You get another one if you go back inside. Neil says that they'll look for the imposters, too, and Kilia apparently likes Colette's wings. OK. ^>__>^

A couple more things to do before leaving Palmacosta: take the path between the Church of Martel and the government building, and go all the way to the steamship... Sheena?! Ahahaha. Oh, and the people at the bow of the ship are apparently attempting to recreate that one stupid scene from "Titanic"... ^<__<^;; Also, return to the cafeteria and play the minigame. If you do well (and I don't mean perfect, just the first two rounds perfect, and you can mess up with two of the orders in the third round), you get gald, and Colette gets her Turbo Waitress title! Yay! (*Tip: Try memorizing it like this: 2 Curry, 2 Eel, 3 Fish, etc., etc., and then watch where the people go after they order)

Southeast of Palmacosta is Nova's Caravan. You can stop there for a short scene in which Lloyd gets smacked by Raine. The people there also mention having seen a giant glowing bird (you'll need to have heard this if you want to get one of the optional Summons). Talk to Nova's kids after the scene. After talking to his son, talk to his daughter to get a Linkite Nut (also important). Lastly, talk to Sarah (she's in the bottom-right corner) for some more info, and then Raine sums it all up for you: First there was the Ossa Trail (a high place), it was near a Linkite tree, and there was a strong wind blowing.

Anyway. From Palmacosta, follow the path going left. When it branches, go right til you reach the edge of the ocean or whatever, then go right again. There's a chest here with an Ex Gem lv. 2 in it. Whee. Anyway. Back where the path split, take the other way, cross the bridge, and keep going straight (i.e., don't take the path going to the right). Stop at the House of Salvation, and enter the building to witness another scene with Sheena. You get more of a scene if you choose to talk to her. If you go upstairs after she disappears then come back down, there'll be people there. One of them says something about the statue looking a little odd...

Keep following the path going northeast, then when it splits, go northwest instead of northeast. At the end of this path is Hakonesia Peak. Right before entering, head right, and at the very end is a chest with a Magic Mist inside.

Hakonesia Peak

Enter the building on the right and talk to the guy there... who's got a clown nose, apparently. ^O__o^;; Wait wait wait, 100,000,000g? PER PERSON?! OK OK, I'm sorry I said you had a clown nose! ^>__<^! Well... he apparently hates men... but calls Raine a beauty. Heh. Er... Colette? A beautiful maiden? I think he needs his glasses checked... ^<__<^;; And Genis gets smacked again. Haha. Well, you heard the guy: he wants the freaking statue. *sigh* Back to the House of Salvation with y... er? What's going on? The Desians? Ah great. Talk to the people outside again for a skit. You get another one when you leave the Peak. Haha. Anyway.


I'd suggest filling up yer U attack gauge before getting here... ^>__>^ Anyway. Talk to the guy calmly wandering around in a panic (don't ask how that's possible, but that's apparently what he's doing) to find out that the Desians are here, and something about Cacao. You can rest at the Inn if you need to, then head to the town... er, yes, circle. Um... apparently they're going to hang Cacao, even though Chocolat is the annoying bitch who was mouthing off to them. Yep, makes a lot of sense to me... Oh look, they snapped that guy's neck. Fun. And look who shows up, the annoying bitch herself. She runs funny... heh. And Magnius goes into convulsions... ack. Aw, the little kid is throwing rocks at the big bad Insane Clown Posse-wannabe. Woohoo, Demon Fang! Apparently Raine wants to just let Cacao die... well, at least Colette's on your side. Huzzah Genis! Who knew Colette would have such good aim? I figured if she tried that, she'd chop off Cacao's head... ^<__<^;; Anyway. You get all pissed off, and now it's time to fight! ... as Magnius runs away... loser.

Mini-Boss: Evil Sorcerer, Whip Master (2)
Attacks: Fire Ball

Alright, well, this is why I had you fill up yer U Attack gauge before coming here. Land some regular hits on the Evil Sorcerer, then let loose with yer U Attack! A nice combo here is: Colette's Angel Feathers, Genis' Stalagmite, Kratos' Lightning, and Lloyd's Tiger Blade. The Lightning/Tiger Blade combination gives you a dual attack which is pretty cool (Lightning Tiger Blade). After you kill off Evil Sorcerer Man, the fight's over.

Well, Cacao and Chocolat thank you after the fight, and talk about Cacao's husband and mother... and if you haven't figured out that the mother they're talking about is Marble, I should whomp you with something. Well, Chocolat gets a lecture on Martel and religion, and then you can leave (although there's a new book up here now that lists all of the Dwarven Vows, ifyer interested). Hahaha, "Why do they have this stupid book here?" Aaaaaand another skit... in which Kratos gets called an ape. *snickers* Well, anyway. At the entrance to Palmacosta is a new person dressed in something akin to the Head Priest's robes, with long brown hair. Talk to him/her/it, and they ask you if you'll escort them to Hakonesia Peak. You can either escort them all the way, or just half of the way (which would be the House of Salvation). Now, you get nothing from this, except for the fact that you get instantly transported to whichever one you chose, so go ahead and choose "Well, part of the way..."

House of Salvation

After the person thanks you, go forwards, and some random person shows up. Huh, apparently some random tour guide has b... er... isn't that... Chocolat?! Choose OK, obviously (you'll see why in a bit). Enter the building and talk to the priests in the back. Apparently, the moronic priest lost the real Spiritua Statue, and had Dirk (yes, that Dirk) make a replacement. Sooooooo... you can't go through the Peak right now anyway. Doesn't really matter what you choose here, you still end up thinking about getting the statue back. Choosing "The problem is the geyser..." makes you sound smarter... :oD Well, you do need it to get through the Peak... anyway. Buy whatever you might need, like, ever ever ever, then... to the Palmacosta Human Ranch!

Palmacosta Ranch

From Palmacosta, go to where you found the Ex Gem Lv. 2 earlier, but instead of going right when you reach the ocean, go left. When you get to the end, go left again, past the Guide Post Monument, then keep following the path. The Ranch will be to the North.

Go forwards after the skit, and Neil calls to you. Wait, what? A trap? Ahhhhhh, so Dorr is Teh Evil. Boo to decisions and talking, let's take action! Attaaaaaaaack! (then again, if you choose not to, skip ahead to the next heading on this page). Neil decides to join you, although he's not a playable character. Going left leads you to a dead end, so take the right path from your current location, and get ready for a whole slew of fights. After defeating the three soldiers out here, inspect the gate to open it, then head on through. Beat up all of the guards, then keep going forwards and enter the building.

If you went to talk to Dorr first, start here when you get back (otherwise, skip to the next paragraph): Talk to Neil, and he joins you. Go left and inspect the console there. Enter the password you got from Dorr (3341) to release the lock, then enter. Go left, then up and right, and defeat the Desian for a Memory Gem. Go right into the next area.

Inspect the odd glowing thing in the back. ... more oddness. Yes, using the Ring activates a teleporter in the back, but go right instead. Use the Ring and inspect the odd green thing near where you came in (pictured on the left). Use the Ring again, then examine the blue thing on the other corner. This activates a path to get to the next platform. go left, and you ask Raine about those blocks. So yeah, that thing heals you. Remember that. Beat up the guy in this area to get the Purple Card, then use the Ring again and examine the thing that's similar to the one you got White Silver from earlier. You get an Orange Gel, huzzah. By the way, the block thing also lets you buy stuff, in case you didn't in Palmacosta. Ring, inspect blue thing like the one that created a path earlier to make another path. Go north and use the Ring again while on this small platform, then inspect the spark to get a Life Bottle. Go back to the previous area.

This time, go left. Beat up the guard to get a Memory Gem (unless you saw Dorr first, in which case you already got the Memory Gem), use the Ring, and inspect the spark for an Apple Gel. Go left, Ring, Orange Gel, then go north. Ring, Life Bottle, then back to the Orange Gel area. Go south and right, Ring, then Orange Gel at the end of the hallway.

Back in the first room, use the teleporter (Ring first, of course), then go forwards. Save, then go right. This is the upper portion of the room we got the Purple Card from. There are also "invisible" blocks around here. Use the Ring to see them, and go towards the stairs at the bottom of this area. Push that block in front of them into the first hole, and the spark gives you an Ex Gem Lv. 2. Push another block into the hole after that one, allowing you access back to the vending machine/revilatizer. In the back of this are is a block tucked into a "corner" and a spark in the middle of it. Move the block out of the way, and the spark gives you a Mage Cloak for Genis. Examine the blue thingy to reveal a path onto the next platform. Go down the stairs there, and Colette comments on something sparkling. She flies up the the large blue thing, and you get the Red Card.

Back in the SP area, go left. This is where the Desians keep all of the humans... Neil decides to take care of them. Hey there lil kid, whatCHA want? Awww, he wants to thank you, and gives you the Blue Card. Cute kid. Well, there's nothing more of interest in this area, so go back to the SP, save, then go north. Use the Ring to activate the teleporter in the back, and the thing asks you for a card. You use your cards, and get teleported up.

Go north, bypass the first teleporter, and use the one on the left (there's a Melange Gel before it, though). The trick here is to use the teleporters that have the spark in front of them. The one you want on this floor is the one all the way on the left, but the spark there sets off an alarm and gets you into a fight... ^>__>^;; On the next floor, take the north one (spark == fight again). Next floor, it's the one on the left (spark == Orange Gel this time), then the north one (spark == fight), left (fight again), and finally we get to where we want to go.

Oh look, it's Chocolat. Too bad they haven't killed her yet... I mean... ^>__>^;; Another regular fight... yeah, sure... Dorr did that, sure... ^<__<^;; Follow her to the teleporter (use this time to heal), then use it. Helloooo, control room... and hellooooooo chickenshit Magnius. Yes, OK, video, that's great. Uh oh... Hrm... you'd think Magnius wouldn't even know the names of the so-called "vermin"... ah well. Yes, Marble. I told you, didn't I? Like it wasn't obvious already. Yeah, great, psychological mind games. Bah, just let the idiot who put herself back in Desian hands die. ^>__<^ Man, I really hate her now... bah. So die already, you annoying bitch! Gaaaah. ... *sigh* Does Magnius ever fight his own battles? Oh, well, I guess he does.

Boss: Magnius
HP: 8,500
TP: 120
Strengths: Fire
Attacks: Flame Lance, Eruption
My current level: Lloyd 19, Colette 18, Kratos 18, Genis 18, Raine 18

Go after Magnius, duh. The other guys are nothing. Have Colette cast Angel Feathers a lot, and hope that she doesn't take forever to do so. Sword Rain followed by Beast is a good combo for Lloyd. Genis' Stalagmite is a nice touch, too. Use your U Attack on Magnius when you can! After he's dead, get rid of the two losers that were following him. Do NOT use fire spells against Magnius (like that isn't obvious).

... no, I have no idea what the hell Magnius is babbling on about. Raine starts poking things, and you see Chocolat being led off, although I really don't see why anybody would care at this point. Raine opens up the room holding Neil and the prisoners, and more talk about Exspheres ensues. OK, to Dirk we go? Er... AAAAAH, RUN AWAAAAAAAAAAY!!!! Ah, die already, Magnius, ya moron. Huh... whozzat? OK... weird evil half-elf guy, clueless Neil, and kick-ass explosions. Neil begs for you to take him with you when you confront Dorr. Well, alright then.


If you chose to talk to Dorr first, return to Palmacosta, leaving Neil at the ranch. I'd suggest resting in the House of Salvation first (if you completed the ranch section)... especially since it's half the price of Palmacosta's Inn. Anyway. Yes, the person that you escorted is back in Palmacosta... anyway. Go talk to that moron, Dorr! ... who's... not home. Enter the prison (yes, the basement is the prison)... and find Dorr, Kilia, and some slimy Desian down there. ... demon seed? Well, sorry dorry, but we killed off Magnius (if you completed the ranch, that is). Ahahaha. And he asks for Neil... who's right in front of him (again, if you completed the ranch). Yep. ^9__9^;; ... I thought Clara was dead? Ack, another mutant! Nuuuuuu... ... and what's with Genis? Like he hasn't seen one before... ^9__9^ Wow, what a selfish bastard Dorr is. Oh yeahhhhhhh, you told him! :oD Colette gets all annoying again, and what an odd kid... what the?! Ack! Evil mutant Kilia! Well, yes, we know Dorr is an idiot. But man... that's just really stupid. *kicks Dorr* Well... OK, fine, we'll fight the annoying purple weirdo.

Boss: Kilia
HP: 10,000
TP: 400
Strengths: Darkness
Weaknesses: Light
Attacks: Acid Rain, Dark Sphere, Spark Volt
My current level:
     Talked to Dorr first: Lloyd 16, other party members: 15
     Infiltrate the Ranch: Lloyd 19, other party members: 18

If you infiltrated the Ranch first, then put Raine inyer party, so she can cast Photon. Her first form isn't hard at all. Again, Colette with Angel Feathers, and have Genis casting Spread or Stalagmite. After heavy damage, she sprouts things from her back. Hit her hard this time, with a U Attack if you can, otherwise just bombard her with spells/techs. She's not much more dangerous, it's just that her physical attacks hit harder (100+ damage each), and she starts using Dark Sphere. This fight shouldn't last too long... Angel Feathers is great because it's a light-based attack. Alternatively, if Raine is inyer party, have her casting Photon a lot. Or both.

After the fight, Kilia lets Clara loose, who moves to attack you, but Colette apparently stops her. Odd. ... and since when did you turn into a liar? Ah well, all for a dying man, I suppose... Agree, you monkey! He gives you a Pass (or a Card Key if you came to talk to him first, and the code: 3341), then dies. Well, if you didn't go to the ranch first, you'll have to now (haha). Scroll back up to the "Palmacosta Ranch" section on this page for that bit. Otherwise, Neil decides to reorganize the government, and everybody seems to have forgotten that there's now a monster loose somewhere... ^<__<^;;

There's now a soldier standing in the bottom-right corner of the town circle. This opens up a new minigame, although there are no prizes. How cheap. (*Warning: Once you start this mini-game you CANNOT LEAVE unless you either a) finish the game, or b) talk to the soldier and give up). Anyway. Talk to Cacao before leaving, just to let her know what's going on. Buy a Battle Staff for Raine (you'll see why soon), then talk to the person at the entrance to Palmacosta again, and choose House of Salvation.

Breaking the Water Seal

Angelic Awakening

Fire, Mutants, and Jail, Oh My!

Breaking the Fire Seal